Rescue Hurts.......

Why buy from a breeder when there are plenty of homeless pups in shelters???
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pittymomma
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Rescue Hurts.......

Postby pittymomma » Wed Jan 02, 2008 6:54 pm

I know Im preaching to the choir but I need too..I am sorry.

These last couple months have been nothing but heartache and the overwhelming feeling of " what the f&*ck am I doing this for".

I know every rescuer has felt like throwing in the towel and people will tell you to "think of all the dogs you have helped" and that ends justify the means rationally I know all this but it's just not working.

I have never been religious and have always thought of myself as a good person who does things right and I rescue all these unwanted pit bulls so I must have good karma.... well I have suddenly become a believer in a higher power and I don't think he/she is very nice or funny.

I love this breed as a whole and am okay with having to make judgement calls regarding which dogs we adopt out but these past few months we have had some doozies. Amazing dogs that we chose to kill and I can't put it any milder than that. I made the appointment so therefore I killed them.

In a province that has banned a breed and ultimately wants them extinct we are fighting an ever steeper uphill battle when adopting out this breed I used to chalk up educating the public as part of the job and I enjoyed it now whats the point, I get it people just dont care and life goes on so why do I waste my breath? the one person who actually listened isnt planning on adopting anyway they were probably just humouring me or felt bad for the muzzled dog. Newsflash I didnt want their sympathy I want this breed to be okay but how do you calmy say this with out looking like a crazy pit bull rescuer?

I love receiving updates from adopters and pictures and stories and its comforting to know that we have made them so happy and I smile for a minute and look at the picture and say awe but then my reality kicks in and I think when did I become a martyr who is making everyone but themselves happy?

Don't get me wrong I love the dogs and I love being a part of the bigger picture but lately pulling dogs from deathrow has become routine just like washing my face and brushing my teeth but its frustrating to know that this breed has it tough and I am tired of seeing the shelters flooded and am tired of having to put down dogs and be judged and critized for it from people who 1) dont own the breed 2) people who coo at cutesy pictures but bolt when volunteers are needed.

ANd I want to schedule a meltdown into my life but I just cant find the time I am already up at 4:30 in the morning. lol

Then I have people tell me to take a vacation- where the hell am I going to go on vacation?? and who is going to baby sit the 9 dogs I have? tell me one place where I would be able to relax and be able to afford besides taking a nap in my bed.

And I think I need a break but then I realize thats not who I am. I can't let the hurt I am feeling for Lammy or Harry trump the goofy flirty pit bull sitting in their concrete cell who I am sure can make the bully world proud if he gets out of the shelter alive......right just like all the others we have said that about who sit in foster care and granted they are loved and well taken care of but I dont think any sane person signs up to actually want to own 5 or more dogs who cant be in the same room together.

Ahh life would be so much simpler if I rescued fish.

crazy V

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luvnstuff
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Postby luvnstuff » Wed Jan 02, 2008 7:09 pm

I hear ya.

and I really HEAR you.

yes.. break.... I was scheduled for one of those three dogs ago.
it never ends, the faces forever haunt, the stories fill our heads, they anger our souls and burn our a**. We get so pissed off, then a happy moment erupts and we again, trudge on.

<<HUGS>>
for what its worth. I do hear you.
I look at the lil lives running around that would be dead, and realize they really did deserve that ONE chance. I guess we ARE the chance , (us in rescue or those who take in an animal).

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violet
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Postby violet » Wed Jan 02, 2008 7:44 pm

V...Since I personally had my own mini break down this past Sunday..man can I feel ya. But I have one word for you.

Neville.

I could go on and on with those simple words..names of all the successes. I am not sure how I would handle it if I was up there with you guys, but you are fighting an amazing battle that has been felt world wide in teh pit bull community. All I can say is THANK you..you are an inspiration.

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BabyReba
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Postby BabyReba » Wed Jan 02, 2008 8:09 pm

sigh. i wish i had some words of wisdom to offer, but i had to re-evaluate what i was doing after doc came into my life and i decided to let go of formal rescue work, at least for now.

i admire what you do and the tenacity you have shown in doing it all this time. i know it's not much, but i hope it helps to hear that. hang in there, someday i hope you'll be able to look back at your successes and feel like all that heartache was worth it!

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airwalk
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Postby airwalk » Wed Jan 02, 2008 9:51 pm

From a shelters perspective...I love rescuers. They are often the only outlet I have for those truly wonderful dogs that are truly wonderful, but my guests haven't been able to see past the color or the age or whatever and keep passing them by.

It is hard, you're right, but every night I look in the mirror and remember that what I do every day means something worthwhile to at least one dog. There are lots of folks that can't say that every single day.

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amyd
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Postby amyd » Wed Jan 02, 2008 9:54 pm

:hug:
Once a man was walking along a beach. The sun was shining and it was a beautiful day. Off in the distance he could see a person going back and forth between the surf's edge and and the beach. Back and forth this person went. As the man approached he could see that there were hundreds of starfish stranded on the sand as the result of the natural action of the tide.
The man was stuck by the the apparent futility of the task. There were far too many starfish. Many of them were sure to perish. As he approached the person continued the task of picking up starfish one by one and throwing them into the surf.

As he came up to the person he said, "You must be crazy. There are thousands of miles of beach covered with starfish. You can't possibly make a difference." The person looked at the man. He then stooped down and pick up one more starfish and threw it back into the ocean. He turned back to the man and said, "It sure made a difference to that one!"

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Postby zookeeper » Wed Jan 02, 2008 10:06 pm

I don't have huge rescue, and yes there are days when I wanna just hit the gas pedal instead of turning into my driveway, or throw my computer out the window when I read of another person tell me how they can't keep their dog anymore because they are moving into an new house they can't have them at or, that the dog is just to hyper. There are days when I look at all dogs in my house and just cry because I know that if they weren't here they would be in a fighting ring, on a rape stand or worse...

So all I can say is take a deep breath, walk out back and scream really loud, run a bubble bath or do all three in that order... But you are making a differance for at least two dogs, and a family. The dog that got the new family and the next dog to take that dogs place in your home.

And remember we are here too :)

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PuppyPalace
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Postby PuppyPalace » Wed Jan 02, 2008 10:31 pm

I can't really imagine what kind of excuses we'd get about fish. Can a person have kids that are allergic to fish? 'Come and get my hyper goldfish or I swear... I'll flush him'. Do you realize how much work goes into cleaning a tank? And forget tropical fish. I think they're a lot of work with temperature regulating and water types...

Let's be honest. We're all like the breed a little. Misunderstood, restricted and judged. But like them, we get knocked around, and we get up again, and we take on the next day, and we try to remember the dogs we've lost, and at the same time we try to forget them too. Cause it's a lot to carry. It's a lot to carry and still continue on, even on bad days, feeling like grim reapers while we have to tell a shelter we're full, and goodness knows we've just sealed another dog's fate.

I have a lot to learn from my dogs. While I can get very angry at the humans that mistreat them, they seem to let it slide, roll over and chew a bone... like a friend said, they can truly experience pure joy. While we are tied down by the world that is cruel to them, they love life there and then.

In every dog we save, we are also saving a part of ourselves. And every dog you save by letting them go peacefully haunt you because you feel the grief and guilt that should not lie on your shoulders. But I wouldn't want to be in rescue with anyone else that would feel anything less. I want to be in this with you, IQ. 8)

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Postby Murfins » Wed Jan 02, 2008 10:35 pm

V, you truly DO make a difference. Your rescue is one of the few that I admire - you do good work and you save amazing dogs and no, you can't save them all and that SUCKS, but you ARE making big changes, one dog at a time.

*hugs*

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lovebeingme
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Postby lovebeingme » Thu Jan 03, 2008 6:58 am

Those of you that keep going, even when it hurts, even when you think you can't go anymore are the true angels in this world.

Take it from someone who is taking a break.....it hurts worse not to help at all. Doing nothing makes me feel more guilty than having to say I am full to a dog in need. Doing nothing feels more empty than losing a dear friend that you tried your best to save.

Thanks to all of you who keep pushing forward, hopefully us wussies who got out of the game will jump back in soon to help ya'll out. :)

msvette2u

Postby msvette2u » Thu Jan 03, 2008 9:13 am

I don't have any words of wisdom just :hug:

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karini
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Postby karini » Thu Jan 03, 2008 7:28 pm

amyd wrote::hug:
Once a man was walking along a beach. The sun was shining and it was a beautiful day. Off in the distance he could see a person going back and forth between the surf's edge and and the beach. Back and forth this person went. As the man approached he could see that there were hundreds of starfish stranded on the sand as the result of the natural action of the tide.
The man was stuck by the the apparent futility of the task. There were far too many starfish. Many of them were sure to perish. As he approached the person continued the task of picking up starfish one by one and throwing them into the surf.

As he came up to the person he said, "You must be crazy. There are thousands of miles of beach covered with starfish. You can't possibly make a difference." The person looked at the man. He then stooped down and pick up one more starfish and threw it back into the ocean. He turned back to the man and said, "It sure made a difference to that one!"


This really sums it up V - you make a difference ! Don't ever ever forget it...One look at BIN's site and you can see the difference you have made to soooo many dogs... :hug:

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Taffys_Angel
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Postby Taffys_Angel » Fri Jan 04, 2008 12:18 pm

I can't truely put into words how I feel about all that's been going on... I get waaayyy too emotional. I can't write as well as Scotty does, but I just wanted to try and let you know that you are an inspiration, and you have made a difference in ways you can't even imagine. I know rescue is hard, I've seen the toll it takes on people... but you ARE making a difference.

Every person has an effect on others around them, even the tiniest of which can ripple into bigger things, like a pebble tossed into a still pond.

For example, if I hadn't discovered the BIN forums (I was a lurker for ages), I probably wouldn't have gotten so turned on to the idea of adopting a shelter/rescued 'pit bull', vs buying a puppy of some non-bsl effected breed. I may never have said yes when my friend asked me to foster Taffy if she got pulled. Leo wouldn't have been pulled either if I'd said no, as it was a "they both go, or both stay and get pts" thing). So indirectly, you guys saved two dogs you never even met. Both of which are now safe and enjoying new homes and lives.

And even though she can be a huge pain in the butt, I'm so happy to have Taffy in my family. She's become a pretty cool dog....

Right now I'm not in a position to be as active in helping out as some people... fostering or sponsoring or running booths at dog events. But I support you and your mission, and when my situation changes to allow it, I do want to become more proactive. Wheither it's fostering a dog, or helping out in some other way.

I guess what I'm trying to say is... dispite the hurt, you and the rest of BIN really HAVE made a positive difference in people's and dog's lives. Thank you for being strong enough to do what you do.

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Postby merriterrier » Fri Jan 04, 2008 11:44 pm

:hug:

I know it feels hopeless, but you are doing a very important thing!

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JCleve86
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Postby JCleve86 » Sat Jan 05, 2008 10:21 pm

Is it any help to know that when I buy a house after I'm done with nursing school that I plan to devote one foster spot purely to Ontario dogs?

Having not actually ever done fostering myself, I can't say I personally understand...but having known a good handful of long time rescuers and THEIR woes...I can at least relate in that way...and I have to say...sometimes you DO need a break. Neither you nor anyone else is the energizer bunny...we were not meant to just keep going and going and going. Hence why the folks in Europe get what us Americans (and/or Canadian neighbors) would consider ridiculous vaca time from work. That's one thing they've figured out.

And though it's not the same, I've been near dropping out of nursing school because of the stress and exhaustion...but now that we are on vaca and have been for a few weeks, I am re-charged and ready to go.

So I guess my suggestion would be to just maintain the dogs you have now (no easy task with nine). See if someone else in the rescue can be the one who goes to the shelter and does all that work and just focus on yourself and your current dogs. If time allows, take an hour (even half) per day where you don't work with any of the dogs and just relax...take a bath, watch a favorite show or movie (which could I suppose involve a dog or two to snuggle), read a book (NOT DOG RELATED!)...just give yourself some time to breathe, and than get back on the wagon.


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